Don't Close Your Heart
by Yukiharu Hime
Summary: Satori cares about Koishi. But she was hoping an empty hope, that Koishi will come back to her, living together again./"Even if the whole world hate you...you have me and animals who love you."/At that moment, Koishi regretted closing her third eye again./Family/Not shoujo-ai, sisterly-love!SatoriKoishi./Oneshot.


The older sister of Komeiji sisters remembers that day. Even now, she still remember.

It was...when her younger sister closed off her third eye, and then went outside on the surface as a wandering youkai. It's been a long time, but she feels that happens just yesterday. Living on underground without sunlight and clock makes her blind of time. It's usually happens.

But the older sister didn't care about that. She live a long life, anyway. A boring life, to be exact. That's why forgetting and unable to tell time, days, months, and years. Everyday feels the same for her. Reading books, writing books as anonymous.

In her isolated room in Palace of the Earth Spirits, she still wondering. She still remember. She still hoping...that her younger sister will come back to her. To their home, away from people's hatred. That her younger sister will always with her, never gone again.

Even though she knows...that the moment her younger sister closed off her mind and heart, it's become impossible for her to open it again...

_**==XX==**_

_**Title: Don't Close Your Heart**_

_**Genre: Touhou FanFiction, Family  
**_

_**Disclaimer: Touhou Project (c) Team Shanghai Alice a.k.a ZUN**_

_**Disclaimer: The cover of Komeiji Sisters (c) Shushio [found at zerochan]**_

_**Warning: Bad English. Sorry for my grammar.**_

_**This is not a shoujo-ai. Only a sisterly-love. Satori cares about Koishi.**_

_**This is a oneshot.**_

_**==XX==**_

"Ah," Komeiji Satori murmurs. She looked at the clock on her room's wall. It's getting late already, while she still wears her eyeglasses, reading some pyschology novels[1]. She sighed, take off her eyeglasses and put it on her desk.

She looked around her. Pile of books were seen on floor. She sighed again. Now she must clean it up. These books are heavy together. Satori feels lazy to do it, but at the end, she do it.

"Huff, it takes longer than usual," Satori said to herself, wiping her sweat off on her forhead. "Maybe I'm getting older. How old am I now? I forgot it already."

She's getting thirsty. Satori decides to go to kitchen, pick up some cookies and making tea. Although she's doesn't sure what time is now, she decides to have a-so-called 'evening tea'. She already had dinner some hours ago. She knows that having snacks on night will make her fat, but it won't affect her anyway. She live a very long life.

Satori puts the plate consists of baked cookies (that was baked some hours ago) and a cup of tea on the tray. "Where should I have my tea?" she asks to herself. She looked around her big mansion. Her pets were scattered around, playing on the mansion. Seeing her pets have fun, Satori giggling to herself.

But as an isolated youkai, Satori likes quiet place. Especially places when she won't read someone's mind. In other words, when she alone. Seeing there's no one at other garden, she decides to have her evening tea there. She sits on the white chair, then sips her black tea. "Haa..." she sighed on her relaxed mind and body. She eats the cookie.

"It's not warm anymore...oh well, it's been some hours," she said to herself, enjoying the cookie. These cookies was baked by Kaenbyou Rin, nicknamed Orin. It's unusual for a _kasha_[2] like her to cook something, but Satori thinks Orin just too bored playing with her souls and decided to do something new. The results were not bad. It taste good, but Satori thinks the cookie has too much sugar. It's really sweet.

"Koishi will like this cookie..." she murmurs, then realize what she just said. "Ah...she not here anymore. Too bad," Satori said to herself, looking at the cookie on her hands. She already forgotten how many cookies she already ate.

She gazed at the opposite direction of her chair. Gazed blankly; staring at the empty white chair. She remember now. At the past, she usually had snacks and tea like this, then ate it together with her younger sister, Komeiji Koishi, at the garden. She unable to tell time since the past, so they had the snacks and tea time whenever Koishi is hungry. They usually had random conversations, laughing, joking...well, in the past. Now, Satori is all alone, having snacks and tea time alone.

"Koishi..." she murmurs sadly, cracking the cookie with her tooth. Satori thought that Koishi's decision to closed off her third eye and wandering on the surface is meaningless. Satori knows she must be have fun on her journey, but...Koishi, technically, doesn't have a mind...since she closed off her third eye to read minds. Then, she is unable to have true emotions. She doesn't have a mind capable of feeling emotions. Even though she looked like having fun, she doesn't know and doesn't understand feelings, emotions.

Closing her third eye means she closed her own conscious mind. Lack of own's mind means she can't read minds anymore. Away from people's hatred, that her older sister felt. Satori thought it must be lonely. Having an endless journey, homeless, without any companion, wandering around without nobody notice...but again, Koishi doesn't have a mind capable on feeling that loneliness. She also can't be loved by anyone anymore, since she stays invisible.

But, as her older sister, Satori cares about her. She loves her as a family. She took a pity at Koishi, but she unable to do anything other than giving her pets to be raised[3]. "...the Koishi after closing her third eye...so different from her old self," Satori murmurs while eats a cookie. Right, now, without mind, Koishi doesn't have any personality. Only a satori youkai that smiles anywhere. Raised her pets making Koishi changed a little. Only a little. It's not enough to make her opening her heart to others again.

"Koishi...I know, I'm a coward for hiding at underground to avoid hatred, but...running away by closing own nature is not an option, either."

Satori murmurs, then drinks her tea. She feels a total loneliness, everytime she thinks about Koishi. Even with her pets, her loneliness and sadness on losing her younger sister can't be erased. It always stays in her wounded heart. She is happy in underground, with her pets loving her, but...losing Koishi is too much to bear. After Koishi left, she began to more isolated herself in her room. Hoping that Koishi will come back. Open her heart once again...

But years passed, Koishi didn't totally come back to her. At times she appeared at the garden to have snacks. But only that. Then she leaves, leaving her older sister's hope crumbled bit by bit, until the point she believed that Koishi will never with her again. Like losing half of her soul, Satori's loneliness growing faster. It's only make her wounds worser. Satori wants to understand the new Koishi, but can't read her mind, it's impossible. And without a proper personality, is hard to understand Koishi. For Koishi to opens her heart to others, now is impossible.

"Koishi, even if the whole world hate you...you have me and the animals that love you. Then, why did you..." Satori begins to cry. "...leaving us like that? You don't love us anymore?"

Satori realize that Koishi is in front of her now. Standing with blank eyes.

"...Koishi, whatever your future decision is..." Satori staring at Koishi, still with wet eyes, "...don't forget us, okay? And I'm sure, you didn't totally close your heart," she said, smiling.

"Onee-chan..."

"Whatever your future on the surface is, Koishi, don't close your heart, okay? Because I'm sure someone will love you at the surface," Satori said, then her tears fall again. "Please, I beg...don't...never close your heart, Koishi. Even with your mind, you have a place to be loved..."

"Onee-chan..."

"Don't be a coward like me, okay? Make sure you're brave, strong, and meet a ton of people out there," Satori wipes off her tears. "Then, let me-us, hear your stories, okay? Koishi."

"...Yes, Onee-chan..."

That time, Koishi felt regretted closing off her third eye again[4]. Hearing her sister's thoughts make her realize that doing running away like that is selfish too. She realizes that her sister is strong enough to have people hate her for endless years.

Wanting to hear the shrine maiden's stories, she also wants her sister become happy.

She wants to know more about that shrine maiden, and make her sister smiling with her journey's stories.

She wants to know what youkais the shrine maiden ever fought, and make her sister laughs once again.

The feeling of regret may opens her heart a bit. The feeling of wanting may opens her heart a bit. The feeling of fun may opens her heart a bit.

At least Koishi thought.

When she thought this, Koishi felt the lid of her third eye begin to shift a little.[5]

-END-

==XX==

[1] From Symposium of Post-mysticism: Satori Komeiji: ..mostly staying in her room reading and writing books. She especially loves stories with detailed psychological description of the characters. [touhouwiki]

[2] Orin is a kasha, a demon with a feline form who would swoop down in a sudden gale, which would grow in intensity until it whisked away the casket of the deceased to carry them off to Hell or devour them. [touhouwiki]

[3] Subterranean Animism - おまけ.txt (Koishi Komeiji): Satori took pity on Koishi, ordering her pets to play with her and giving her some pets to keep as her own. [touhouwiki]

[4] Subterranean Animism - おまけ.txt (Koishi Komeiji): She thought, how amazing it is to meet such an interesting person, and wanted to know more about her. For the first time, she regretted having closed her third eye. [touhouwiki]

[5] Subterranean Animism - おまけ.txt (Koishi Komeiji): When she thought this, Koishi felt the lid of her third eye begin to shift a little [touhouwiki] -only copy it.

Note: The 'Shrine Maiden' is Hakurei Reimu. See the . The lines before [5] tells about Koishi who met a strange girl at the mountain and want to hear her stories, the youkais she fought...

==XX==

_A/N: That is! I'm sorry for my bad English. Also sorry for the bad ending. Suddenly, my feelings on Komeiji sisters decreased. I didn't write enough of Satori's feelings (confused)...but I hope you enjoy this fanfic._

_Thank your for reading! If there any mistakes, please tell me! I will edit it!_

_Sign, Iwashari Aiko (Clover0Project)_

_[This is first published at Wattpad. If you see this on Wattpad, this is really Aiko's fanfic.]_


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